I get that I’m just a regular fella; nothing I do entitles me to any more favor than anyone else. God loves me the same as he loves everyone. His love is unconditional and absolute.
I also get that we live in a society that celebrates the vulgar, the cheap, the superficial, the slick, the new, the young, the titillating, the ugly.
There are among us, however, those who operate on another plane, who aspire to reveal beauty, grace, depth, love, understanding and meaning. We are not here to be entertained by or to entertain others. We are engaged in a process of inspiration and edification.
When God hatches an idea in my head and uses my imperfect form in the creation of a revelatory piece of art, or an entire body of work, it is natural to expect a response. But like many hardworking, dedicated creatives, living among us, I am caught in a dilemma. Sometimes it seems the more I produce the more I’m met with indifference. Of course, like most all or nothing statements, this is only partially true. The truth is, there are many factors in play in how much affirmation I receive, some within my control and many others, completely beyond it. Ultimately, the only response that will produce bliss, is to limit my desire for any response or outcome, other than those I actually receive. In fact, this is the principal theme behind Quench, my recently published book. It is also the theme of the my recent documentary short, “Out of Darkness” and indeed the entire project.
So please, I ask you to take a moment to consider the ideas I produce, through this imperfect, aging, non-celebrity form I am currently occupying. Even though I am much like you, or perhaps because of it, consider giving the product of my creativity a look. After all, I have given myself over to God as his imperfect creation and I have worked at my art for over 37 years. Do me the honor of looking deeply into my paintings, written materials, performances on stage and film. I invite you to find yourself, find me, find God in my work. And above all, forgive me if you don’t always find these in what I do. Sometimes it can feel like a waste of your valuable time. But it’s not. So please don’t give up on my work. My work and ideas are still in progress, and will be until my last breath on Earth.
I urge you to look beyond my imperfections, maybe even embrace them. Find the meaning and love behind my ideas, not in me, as I gave up mattering years ago. It is, and always has been, about the ideas themselves. These are the gifts of grace, for which I will always remain grateful. No matter how you choose to react to this plea, be assured that I derive complete and utter satisfaction from the creative process itself. Your participation is only part of the process, albeit an important part. Don’t do it for me. Do it for yourself.
And, in exchange, I will continue to do the same for you. I will marvel and admire how God has blessed you with your talents and how hard you have worked to develop them. Because we are all in this together. We draw our inspiration from one another, we who are fellow strivers, connivers and creative enlivers. This is our time on Earth together. We were chosen for each other, to learn from and be inspired by one another. This is why we are here.